Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
Creating
Caring
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Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
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Friday, August 22, 2014 @ 12:00:00 AM - Written by Doug Hignell -

The stress of life is overwhelming at times. I have a deep seated drive to fix myself and fix those around me. I have pushed myself to have a more intimate walk with Jesus, to be a better husband and father and grandfather, and a better lover of people. Fortunately, the last few years I have begun to realize that "I am not okay, and that is okay!" The good news (the Gospel) sets me free to trust Jesus and His work in my life and this has led to me finding it easier to let others "not be okay" as well. Jesus has used many things to help me including books and blog posts by Tullian Tchividjian, Billy Graham’s grandson, the pastor of Coral Ridge Church in Florida. What follows are excerpts from "You’re Not Okay, and That is Okay", a blog Tullian posted July 10, 2014 at pastortullian.com.

 "The gospel liberates us to be okay with not being okay. We know were not okay—though we try very hard to convince ourselves and other people that were basically fine. But the gospel tells us, "Relax, it is finished. The pressures off.

Coming to grips with the fact that I am not okay, that at the core I am a flawed human being without Jesus, is becoming tremendously freeing. I have spent way too much energy during my lifetime trying to prove that I have it together. What a waste of time and energy!

 "Because of the gospel, we have nothing to prove or protect. We can stop pretending. We can take off our masks and be real. The gospel frees us from trying to impress people, appease people, measure up for people, or prove ourselves to people. The gospel frees us from the burden of trying to control what other people think about us. It frees us from the miserable, unquenchable pursuit to make something of ourselves by using others."

As I am writing this post, the song, "The Great Pretender" released in the 50's by The Platters, came to mind: 

"Oh-oh, yes I'm the great pretender

Pretending that I'm doing well

My need is such I pretend too much

I'm lonely but no one can tell"

That captures most of my life, pretending that I am doing well and have it all together. Thankfully, Jesus has it together for me and I am free to love and be loved in spite of my weaknesses. 

My son-in-law, Ric, has a favorite saying that challenges my thinking: 

"Nothing to prove, nothing to lose, nothing to fear" 

Do you struggle with "not being okay?" If so I would encourage you to follow Tullian on liberate.org and pastortullian.com. I also recommend his books "One Way Love" and "Jesus + Nothing = Everything." 

Knowing that many of us struggle with the same challenges, and that we are all learning together is encouraging for me. I hope it is for you too.

Comments
Thanks, Doug. Love you and Kay. Knowing and experiencing the freedom of the Gospel...sometimes they don't meet up. Love His grace....it's amazing.
Nancy Johnson @ 2:05:16 PM 9/1/2014
As usual this is perfect timing for me, I needed this tonight. I am with someone who is holding me accountable for how I do things. How long it takes me to react and on šnd on. Im frustrated because I don't do that to others, why should it happen to me. Then I read your blog; I'm ok being imperfect. Jesus is perfect where perfection is required. I'm ok being not ok, I wish I had read that before I got pissed off at being critiqued."nothing to prove, nothing to lose, nothing to fear." I'm ok not being ok, yeah...This might turn out to be a good night after all. Thanks Doug, I happy you are wri ting again.
Michael @ 2:07:07 PM 9/1/2014
Thank you Nancy and Michael for your encouragement. Michael, the Holy Spirit has a way of brining things to our attention just as we need them. So glad that "Your Not Okay..." came at just the right time.
Doug @ 2:49:05 PM 11/18/2014
Thanks, Doug. Love you and Kay. Knowing and experiencing the freedom of the Gospel...sometimes they don't meet up. Love His grace....it's amazing.
Nancy Johnson @ 2:49:25 PM 11/18/2014

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