Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
Creating Caring Communities That Transform Lives
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Tuesday, November 25, 2014 @ 10:52:00 AM - Written by Doug Hignell -

A dear friend of mine is currently facing an incredibly tough situation: his wife has cancer. They've tried a variety of treatments with the understanding that once the treatments stop working, she will have about six months to live. Chemotherapy is no longer effective. As a last step, they’re now trying a medicine that has a small chance of stopping the cancer. My friend and I are in contact several times per week. Just after they found out that chemotherapy was no longer working, he posted this on Facebook:


Feel like I'm on a flight over the ocean where the pilot just announced that there wasn't enough fuel to make it to a place to land. Confident in my relationships. Not afraid just want to know what is best until impact……Faith for more fuel or time is at least the size of mustard seed. Should be enough. Going to enjoy every moment, at least till we start losing altitude...or was that attitude?


Though Kaylinn's Stage 4 breast cancer treatment gives her more than six months to live, I certainly understand my friend, as I also oscillate between hope and grief. I wrote this back:


Read your recent Facebook post about your flight over the ocean. Hoping and grieving for you at the same time, probably the same place you are...hoping for God to intervene, and yet the recent news throws you back into potential reality. Most likely you switch back and forth between the two (hope and grief). I know I do for you. I have been meditating on one of the most used phrases in the Bible: "Do not fear," which is often followed by "for I am with you." As it relates to your journey and to my journey, I desire that we not live in fear, knowing that God is with us even if we lose our wives or if God heals them. At times, it is tough for me being human with human emotions. I have to fight to not dwell on the "what if's" and just rest in the "I am with you." My dear friend, I am not preaching. I am just sharing my own struggle, as I feel connected to you and your struggle.


As I reflect on my ongoing conversation with my friend, I know that we aren't promised a life free of suffering. Isaiah 41:10 does not say, "So do not fear, for I will take away your suffering." Yet, in the midst of our suffering, we don’t just give up. That's the case for my friend's wife, as many people around the country are praying for her healing. Sometimes God does intervene, answers our prayers, and removes the cause of our suffering.


What God does promise, however, is to be with us in our suffering. That's the source of our hope: that we are not alone in our suffering and that He will walk with us through every step. As it relates to my friend's wife and to Kaylinn, I pray daily for a healing miracle and will do so until there's no more time left to pray. Yet, my real hope is in the knowledge that no matter what life brings, He is with us.


In the words of a 19th century hymn by Edward Mote:


"When Darkness veils his lovely face,

I rest on his unchanging grace.

In every high and stormy gale,

my anchor holds within the veil."


In your current struggles, where is your hope?

Doug, These are powerful thoughts; very Godly given. You remind me of our good Brother Henri Nouwen. We are not alone in our suffering for He is with us always. He also has his hands and feet along side you two too. You are Him, and by us.
Tim Hull @ 2:03:21 PM 11/26/2014
Thank you Tim for your kind comments. As much as I dislike suffering, God sure uses it for good. In the midst of the suffering we find His peace and presence which becomes even more a part of our lives.
Doug @ 1:42:16 PM 12/5/2014

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